four days in paris with young children

This is for my dear friends, Cara and Evan, who are headed to Paris tomorrow with their 3- and 5-year-olds, but I figured I might as well share it with you, too, in case you have little kids and are planning a long weekend in the city of lights.

We spent the month of September living in Paris with our 1-year-old and 4-year-old, and we fell in love with the beautiful city. With two little ones in tow, our trip wasn't one of leisurely riverside evenings sipping wine (maybe one day!) but one of going to playgrounds every day and seeking out kid-friendly museums, activities, and restaurants. And Paris was much more family-friendly than I'd expected.

So! Here are some of our favorite kid-friendly discoveries in what we feel is the most beautiful city in the world. Enjoy!

don't apologize

Well, I should qualify that. Do apologize if you step on someone's foot or are an inadvertent jerk, but don't apologize if you're trying to create a masterpiece of some kind, and it falls short in your eyes.

There has been a lot of apologizing in my fiction writing course lately, and I say people, STOP apologizing for your work.

My partner and I always joke that it's too late to apologize.

Seriously, though. You are where you are, and that's just part of the process.

Ira Glass said it so well here.

As my acting teacher used to say:

You aren't the best; you aren't the worst.

So, let's put our egos aside and focus on the work.

Instead of saying, "I'm sorry," say:

"I'm awesome" 

instead.

Because at least you're trying, and that's more than many others can say.

Boo ya.

just say no

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I'm more focused on saying no to too many commitments, but I thought this image was funny
(and saying yes to tacos is always a good thing, right?). 

It's easy to want to say yes to everything, but I am feeling more and more that time is too sacred and scarce to share indiscriminately. It's not like I'm going to die tomorrow (well, I hope not), but I want to do so many things, and especially with two little children, the time to get things done is minimal.

We've learned that sleep deprivation makes you stupid and zaps your creativity, so my earlier tactic of simply not sleeping to get everything done isn't the way to go. And if we only have so many waking hours, what can we do?

We have to cull. The word, cull, comes from killing off weaker animals to strengthen the herd, which seems appropriate. You have to be ruthless if you really want to make progress. What is absolutely crucial? What are the things that truly makes our souls soar into the sky? We are what we spend time doing.

For me, I'm on a mission, and I'm starting to cut everything out. If it isn't time with my family or writing, it's pretty much getting cut out of my life. I want to finish these writing projects, and I want to spend time with my family. Everything else feels like a distraction right now. I know I'm being a bit intense, but you have to be, or else life will pass you by—and "eventually" will never come. At the writer's conference, one of the instructors said he scheduled his writing time and treated it like a real appointment, never to be missed.

So, if you want to develop a craft or fulfill a dream, you, too, will have to protect the time doing what is most precious to you, and say no to everything else (even if it's fun).

unfurling

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You know that intoxicating, exhilarating feeling you get when you're falling in love with someone or something new? Where you feel like you've been crumpled up into a tight little ball all of your life and can finally spread your wings and be you and free and open and larger than life and part of the universe at large?

I found it.

For now.

I've fallen in love before, felt this high before, and then life gets in the way, and I lose it again. Well, I'm a little older and a little wiser now, and I'm hoping I'll get to enjoy this flight a little longer this time.

And where is this magical feeling? Funny enough, it has been inspired by my first MOOC (massive open online course) that I'm taking with the University of Iowa. Yes, they're considered the bastion of creative writing in the country, etc., etc., etc. And the fiction course has already been both illuminating and fun. But the real spark for me is the combination of actively writing while also being part of a writing community.

It's like being a frog in a duck pond for years and then discovering other frogs. I've finally found my tribe, and we are a wonderfully quirky bunch. We make jokes about Oxford commas, exalt in a beautiful phrase, and delight in making sentences richer or tighter or more compelling. We bang our heads, drawing the famous trio of body fluids (blood, sweat, and tears) as we struggle to translate the inklings in our heads that feel so magnificent into concrete words that will hopefully also make sense to other people. And maybe, just maybe, we'll be able to write something that someone else will recognize as the truth.

I've connected with one writer so far who I'm already calling my MOOC BFF, and she alone has made my experience as a student once again so much more entertaining and more inspiring than I expected or thought possible. Having someone along for the ride, even if I've never seen her face or heard her voice or know what race she is or anything else, has given the solitary writing career a warmth that I didn't realize was possible. We are connecting as writers first and foremost, and that is an amazing validating experience, too. Thanks, Heather. I've only "known" you online and only for a few weeks so far, but you've already made a positive impact in my life.

So, I tried one career after another, "dating" usually for about four years, and now, I think I've found the One. I'm hoping to finally settle down and commit to being a writer. 100%. No more excuses or distractions.

And from this dream cloud I'm floating in, filled with love and light and enthusiasm, I wish this feeling for everyone. I'm working on a screenplay and hoping to finish it this month. Then, I've signed up for NaNoWriMo and hope to write the novel version of the story in November. And then I have another previous story that I hope to craft into both a novel and screenplay. So, I've made my public commitment and now have to live up to it.

What makes you come alive? What would you do if time and money were no object? What can you do right now/today/this week to inch closer to your dream life? Let's make it happen!

I'm fired up! The sky can't hold me! Want to join me? Let's go!

a love story in 52 seconds

I just attended the Central Coast Writer's Conference, and this was one of the highlights: a love story in fifty-two seconds. Enjoy.

good news network

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I love new beginnings: new years, birthdays, and the start of a new school year. My husband teaches, and my daughters are both going to "school" this fall, so there is a palpable excitement in our house about the new chapter beginning soon. (School starts on Monday.)

If you're in need of a pick-me-up, and the usual bad-news news is bringing you down, I've found the Good News Network to be a great source of good deeds and happy events.

Here's a rundown of some recent happenings:

- Why 100 Black Men In Suits Were Cheering by a School Bus 

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- Mexico Asked Graffiti Artists To Paint An Entire Town – Joy Was the Result

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- He Hauls His Upright Piano to Beaches and Parks Just to Make Your Day

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-  Quiet Time Program Brings Radical Improvement To Schools Worldwide

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It's nice to be reminded that the world is a good place.

entre amigos in san pancho, mexico

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Greetings from Mexico! We have been traveling a ton, so I'm sorry for being MIA for so long. I will post pictures from our trip to India next, but for this post, I had to share a beautiful nonprofit I discovered today called Entre Amigos (Between Friends), based in San Pancho (San Francisco), Mexico.

The founder, Nicole Swedlow, started in 2006 teaching arts and crafts to children with a little art cart on the street, and now, it's a 16,000 square foot space that beautifully combines education, community, art, recycling, a free library, language classes, and a cafe in a wonderfully welcoming atmosphere that you can learn more about here.

If I could create something like this in my lifetime, I would die a happy woman.

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As a bonus, Swedlow, described as extremely humble, was honored by the Dalai Lama last spring as an "unsung hero of compassion," as you can read about here.

bouncy balls

We don't watch TV at home, but my daughter now knows two music videos and loves them. The first is the cello video below, and here is the second one. It's actually a commercial, but I think it's a beautiful work of art, and I love the song ("Hearts" by Jose Gonzalez), too. Enjoy!

how quickly life happens

This is a beautiful time-lapse of a girl from birth to fourteen in four minutes, and wow, it's such a vivid reminder of how quickly life happens.

It reminds me of a photography exhibit I saw once where a man took a photo of his wife each year, and as you followed the 8x10 shots, you saw her age year by year until she went from her 20s all the way through her 70s. It was amazing. I'd love to see a video like this of an entire life...

Enjoy.

a little inspiration for you

Here's a post from design*sponge to inspire you:

5 VIDEOS + TALKS GUARANTEED TO INSPIRE YOU

Everyone finds motivation in different places. Some people prefer it in the form of one-on-one conversations, some enjoy books and others like to see something that combines the power of in-person talks with the ease of a play-on-demand video. I’m working on my own speech for this year’s Weapons of Mass Creation Fest in Ohio, so I decided to round up 5 of the talks (available to watch instantly in video form) that have inspired me the most. From talks on creativity and motivation to opening your mind to new solutions, these people had not only the great ideas and advice to share with all of us, they had the guts to do it on a BIG stage. Thank you to all of these incredible artists, makers and creatives for sharing these inspiring talks, speeches and moments with us online. I will be watching a few of these over and over for years to come. You never know when you’ll need a little pick-me-up or pep talk. xo, grace

“Don’t allow yourself to be tricked into thinking that the way things are is the way the world must work.” -Charlie Kaufman

walking improves creativity

This recent Stanford study found that walking stimulated more creative thinking.  They compared every variation of people walking and not walking, from people on a treadmill facing a blank wall to people being pushed in a wheelchair outside, initially hypothesizing that being outdoors in nature would be the variable that made the difference.  Instead, the people walking on a treadmill facing a blank wall performed better.  So, if you're feeling stuck in a rut, get moving...

taste

I came across this quote a few weeks ago that really resonated with me, and I hope you find it inspiring, too.

“Nobody tells this to people who are beginners, I wish someone told me. All of us who do creative work, we get into it because we have good taste. But there is this gap. For the first couple years you make stuff, it’s just not that good. It’s trying to be good, it has potential, but it’s not. But your taste, the thing that got you into the game, is still killer. And your taste is why your work disappoints you. A lot of people never get past this phase, they quit. Most people I know who do interesting, creative work went through years of this. We know our work doesn’t have this special thing that we want it to have. We all go through this. And if you are just starting out or you are still in this phase, you gotta know its normal and the most important thing you can do is do a lot of work. Put yourself on a deadline so that every week you will finish one story. It is only by going through a volume of work that you will close that gap, and your work will be as good as your ambitions. And I took longer to figure out how to do this than anyone I’ve ever met. It’s gonna take awhile. It’s normal to take awhile. You’ve just gotta fight your way through.” 
― Ira Glass

simple beauty drawing timelapse

It's amazing what one can create with just a pencil, a pen and a touch of color.  Enjoy!

dailydraw timelapse from elfandiary on Vimeo.

our awesome world in photos

Our world is awesome.  Here are some pretty amazing photos of it:

creative class projects = awesome

I'm honored that Trevor, who is clearly talented and going to make beautiful films, decided to choose our cafe for his class project.  Here is his 30-second commercial of our shop.  Enjoy!

Bello Mundo from Trevor Hooper on Vimeo.

what a dad/son/photographer

These girls are adorable, and the story is pretty touching (from boredpanda):

If you are tired of posed, stiff and cheesy family portraits, then take a look at these incredibly creative pictures taken by Jason Lee.

Jason who is a wedding photographer started taking photos of his two little daughters back in 2006 when his mom was diagnosed with non-Hodgkins lymphoma. The girls were constantly sick, with colds and coughs so he couldn’t always bring them to visit their grandmother. Jason wanted her to be able to see her granddaughters without catching their kid germs so he started a blog where his mom could see what was going on in their lives.

Most of the ideas come from his daughters – eight-year-old Kristin and five-year-old Kayla. Jason says that they are never-ending source of ideas.

Lee is a really talented photographer in his own right (you can see his photography website here), but it's really the spirit of fun and whimsy of this collection that I love.  Here are some of my favorites.  Enjoy!

music and maternity photos

My favorite video of all time is still the happy dance around the world (here), but this one (above) of musicians around the world all shot on 10/10/10 is also pretty awesome.  Enjoy!

On a more personal note, life is often funniest when it isn't trying to be.  I'm 34 weeks pregnant this week and 34 years old.  Tomorrow, I'll be 35 weeks pregnant and will be turning 35 years old this coming weekend.  Planned?  Nope.  Kind of a fun coincidence?  Yup. :-)

I really feel the older you get, the more quickly life zooms by.  Here's a time lapse video that I thought was neat, demonstrating just that:

I also just discovered these photo series and think they're a great idea.  Life as art, and art as life.  We've been taking weekly photos, too, to document the growing belly, but we have yet to do anything with them.  

Here are some shots from the original series.  I love the descriptions.  You can see the full blog/series here.

And here are some from the series I came across first (inspired by the above series).  It reflects the different personality of the mom, and I have to admit I cried at the end of this one.  You can see the whole series here.

unexpected art (from the diverse arts project)

This is reposted from the diverse arts project, and I hope you'll enjoy it:

Part of the appeal and magic of art is that it can appear (and disappear) at any time and any place.

I was recently reminded of a documentary by Scottish artist Andy Goldsworthy that I enjoyed, entitled "Rivers and Tides," and how often beauty and artwork can truly vanish in a moment. Here is the trailer:

Accompanied by sappier music (possibly from "Somewhere in Time"), here is more of his work: 

Simon Beck is creating snow shoe art near Mont Blanc in France in a similar way.  For a sense of scale, note the tiny two skiers in the top right corner:

You can read more about his work here, but the short version is that this man walks around for hours and hours (nine sounds average), creating these amazing snow "crop circles" with the knowledge that as soon as it snows again, his art will be gone.

Another heart-warming story about the unexpected outcomes of art is about Joshua Johnson, a 20-year-old man from Harlem, who has been tap dancing in New York City subways to pay for college.  You can see him in action here: 

And you can read more about him in both the New York Times and on the Good News Network site, which shares the story of how he was tap dancing to pay for his college tuition and help his mother, who lives in a shelter-- and how he ended up on the Ellen show and receiving a generous check (and a pair of fancy tap shoes).

Yay, art.  And they say art doesn't pay... :-)

happy 2012

Happy new year!  Holy cow, I can't believe I haven't posted anything since November.  Just goes to show that time can truly slip away quickly!

I'm still going through travel photos and will post soon with the rest of South America and start the Asia segment, but in the meantime, here's a CNN video and New York Times article about a cell phone that stopped the New York Philharmonic.  The offending party sat in the front row and didn't realize it was his phone-- his apologetic response is in the NYT article.  I thought it was a fascinating juxtaposition of new and old colliding.

---

And here's an email I got recently.  I know, it's yet another forwarded, lengthy and maybe even untrue story, but I thought it was pretty touching.  Enjoy. :-)

Two Choices 


What would you do?....you make the choice.

Don't look for a punch line, there isn't one. Read it anyway. My question is: Would you have made the same choice? 

  
At a fundraising dinner for a school that serves children with learning disabilities, the father of one of the students delivered a speech that would never be forgotten by all who attended. After extolling the school and its dedicated staff, he offered a question: 
  
'When not interfered with by outside influences, everything nature does, is done with perfection.  Yet my son, Shay, cannot learn things as other children do. He cannot understand things as other children do.  Where is the natural order of things in my son?' 
  
The audience was stilled by the query. 
  
The father continued. 'I believe that when a child like Shay, who was mentally and physically disabled comes into the world, an opportunity to realize true human nature presents itself, and it comes in the way other people treat that child.' 
  
Then he told the following story: 
  
Shay and I had walked past a park where some boys Shay knew were playing baseball. Shay asked, 'Do you think they'll let me play?' I knew that most of the boys would not want someone like Shay on their team, but as a father I also understood that if my son were allowed to play, it would give him a much-needed sense of belonging and some confidence to be accepted by others in spite of his handicaps. 
  
I approached one of the boys on the field and asked (not expecting much) if Shay could play. The boy looked around for guidance and said, 'We're losing by six runs and the game is in the eighth inning. I guess he can be on our team and we'll try to put him in to bat in the ninth inning..' 
  
Shay struggled over to the team's bench and, with a broad smile, put on a team shirt.. I watched with a small tear in my eye and warmth in my heart. The boys saw my joy at my son being accepted. 
  
In the bottom of the eighth inning, Shay's team scored a few runs but was still behind by three. 
  
In the top of the ninth inning, Shay put on a glove and played in the right field. Even though no hits came his way, he was obviously ecstatic just to be in the game and on the field, grinning from ear to ear as I waved to him from the stands. 
  
In the bottom of the ninth inning, Shay's team scored again. 
  
Now, with two outs and the bases loaded, the potential winning run was on base and Shay was scheduled to be next at bat. 
  
At this juncture, do they let Shay bat and give away their chance to win the game? 
  
Surprisingly, Shay was given the bat. Everyone knew that a hit was all but impossible because Shay didn't even know how to hold the bat properly, much less connect with the ball. 
  
However, as Shay stepped up to the plate, the pitcher, recognizing that the other team was putting winning aside for this moment in Shay's life, moved in a few steps to lob the ball in softly so Shay could at least make contact. 
  
The first pitch came and Shay swung clumsily and missed. 
  
The pitcher again took a few steps forward to toss the ball softly towards Shay. 
  
As the pitch came in, Shay swung at the ball and hit a slow ground ball right back to the pitcher. 
  
The game would now be over. 
  
The pitcher picked up the soft grounder and could have easily thrown the ball to the first baseman. 
  
Shay would have been out and that would have been the end of the game. 
  
Instead, the pitcher threw the ball right over the first baseman's head, out of reach of all team mates. 
  
Everyone from the stands and both teams started yelling, 'Shay, run to first!  Run to first!' 
  
Never in his life had Shay ever run that far, but he made it to first base. 
  
He scampered down the baseline, wide-eyed and startled. 
  
Everyone yelled, 'Run to second, run to second!' 
  
Catching his breath, Shay awkwardly ran towards second, gleaming and struggling to make it to the base. 
  
By the time Shay rounded towards second base, the right fielder had the ball. The smallest guy on their team who now had his first chance to be the hero for his team. 
  
He could have thrown the ball to the second-baseman for the tag, but he understood the pitcher's intentions so he, too, intentionally threw the ball high and far over the third-baseman's head. 
  
Shay ran toward third base deliriously as the runners ahead of him circled the bases toward home. 
  
All were screaming, 'Shay, Shay, all the Way!' 
  
Shay reached third base because the opposing shortstop ran to help him by turning him in the direction of third base, and shouted, 'Run to third!  Shay, run to third!' 
  
As Shay rounded third, the boys from both teams, and the spectators, were on their feet screaming, 'Shay, run home! Run home!' 
  
Shay ran to home, stepped on the plate, and was cheered as the hero who hit the grand slam and won the game for his team.
  
'That day', said the father softly with tears now rolling down his face, 'the boys from both teams helped bring a piece of true love and humanity into this world'. 
  
Shay didn't make it to another summer. He died that winter, having never forgotten being the hero and making me so happy, and coming home and seeing his Mother tearfully embrace her little hero of the day! 
  

  
AND NOW A LITTLE FOOT NOTE TO THIS STORY: 
  
We all send thousands of jokes through the e-mail without a second thought, but when it comes to sending messages about life choices, people hesitate. 
  
The crude, vulgar, and often obscene pass freely through cyberspace, but public discussion about decency is too often suppressed in our schools and workplaces. 
  
If you're thinking about forwarding this message, chances are that you're probably sorting out the people in your address book who aren't the 'appropriate' ones to receive this type of message.  Well, the person who sent you this believes that we all can make a difference. 

We all have thousands of opportunities every single day to help realize the 'natural order of things.'  

A wise man once said every society is judged by how it treats its least fortunate. 
  
So many seemingly trivial interactions between two people present us with a choice: 
  
Do we pass along a little spark of love and humanity or do we pass up those opportunities and leave the world a little bit colder in the process?   

improv everywhere

I know, it's been ages.  Sorry.  I'm working on my work-life balance, and I'm starting to see light at the proverbial end of the tunnel.

So, on to happier things.  Like Improv Everywhere.  These clips were shot in New York, but I'd love to see more of this all over.

Enjoy!

And here's an old classic: